I understood fully what I was supposed to do, but the hurt and embarrassment seemed too big. To even say I was bitter and holding on to a grudge is a understatement to what I felt.
For the first time in my life, I wanted someone to understand how much they had hurt me. I wanted them to know what they had done was wrong and hurtful. Little did I know this story actually was about me and my heart (Philippians 2:13).
Looking back on this particular memory, I feel peace. The only reason I feel peace is because of God’s grace and forgiveness (Matthew 18:21-35).
That is exactly what this blog is about.
For years I held onto the feelings of resentment of what you just read above. Then one day the Lord asked me to forgive someone. Let me also tell you the person who had hurt me had even apologized and I had rejected them and said, “No.”
With this rejection, came years of regret. All I wanted was to see this person again and shout, “I forgive you!,” but I was too prideful. I wanted it all to disappear in the past, never to be heard of again.
If you are in a similar position as I was then, I want you to know that you aren’t alone. Forgiveness is something we all struggle with at times. However, that doesn’t give us an excuse to not forgive.
The thing that finally pushed me to the line of forgiveness was this verse(s):
When I read those verses I knew I needed to forgive. I needed to let go of the past and realize that people sin just as I do. If God can forgive the unthinkable things I have done against Him, then I can certainly forgive someone who has wronged me (Romans 4:7-8)!
With God’s help, I was able to write a letter (since they live out of state), and express my regret and ask for forgiveness.
Let me also point out, this was all God’s doing in my life. If it was up to me, I would still be holding on to the grudge. Praise be to God who is faithful and good to His children! He taught me how to forgive when I didn’t see how it was possible (Hebrews 12:4-13). Never forget it is by His wounds we are healed (Isaiah 53:5).
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